Would Jesus Attend a Gay Wedding?
The title of our episode is one of the most frequently asked questions that pastors hear from their congregations and a topic that is often discussed in online forums. While there is room to debate the answer, the way we approach this question – and the way we treat those who might come to a different conclusion – says more about us than it does about Jesus or the question itself. Why has this become such a litmus test of orthodox Christian faith? Why doesn’t the fact that we are so scandalized by the issue serve as a warning that we have become the very legalists that we often decry in the pages of scripture?
In this episode, we examine the heart of Jesus in coming close to those who needed him the most, and we contrast his actions with the Pharisees who made sure to publicly and privately keep their distance from the very same people. We ask whether Jesus would do the same today, and point out the ways that many Christian leaders seem to more closely resemble the behavior of the Pharisees rather than that of Jesus. We also examine the many arguments that are stated about what makes a wedding different from other public events, and we break down those arguments to better understand the motivations behind them. In the end, we want to center our answer on Jesus: if he would attend, then we should; and if he would not, then we should not.
Discussion Questions:
Are you tempted to distance yourself from anyone who disagrees with the way that you believe this question should be answered? What is behind the temptation to distance ourselves from people who disagree over this issue and to instead surround ourselves with people who agree with us?
Do you agree that the church seems to care about this one issue over and above any other way that we might live counter to God’s will? When we read 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, is there a way to see one of the lifestyles presented by the Apostle Paul as contrary to the kingdom of God as being inherently different from the others listed? Do you have a particular struggle in one area that is identified in this list?
Monique points out that no one asks whether they should attend a wedding if the bride or groom have been having sex before the wedding, or if the bride or groom have lusted or been addicted to porn, or whether it is a second marriage for the couple? Is there a distinction that should be made between these types of weddings and those that involve a gay couple?
Many of us rightly want to follow the example of Jesus and the will of God expressed in scripture. We believe that the way our actions point to Jesus can be either a positive or negative witness to others. Are you also concerned by the way that your actions can be seen by others to point towards Jesus or away from Jesus? Do you have a particular concern in the way that our actions speak to this particular issue?
How does Jesus’ table fellowship with Matthew and the other tax collectors reframe the issue? Were you aware that table fellowship implied acceptance of people and signified close ties? Were you aware that this “endorsement” was precisely why the Pharisees were so outraged? Had you previously imagined that Jesus was only there to call people to repentance and was clear about this condemnation of their lifestyle? Even if this was his ultimate intent, why would the Pharisees have been so unwilling to do the same thing that Jesus did?
Was there something about the way that Jesus went about his mission that made it more likely that people would follow him rather than the Pharisees who had been unable to do so long before and long after Jesus’ earthly ministry?
Is there a difference between Jesus reclining with the tax collectors and attending a gay wedding? Do you believe Jesus would have done one but have reason not to do the other? What are the reasons that you might believe these issues are different?
When Jesus says, “I desire mercy, not sacrifice,” what does this teaching mean for the follower of Jesus on this particular issue? Is there an area you can apply this in your relationship with others that God has brought into your life?
